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super troopers opening scene script

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- And, no, we're not doin' it. It's Afghanistanimation. Rock'n' roll! I swear to God I'll pistol-whip the next guy that says, 'shenanigans.' Watch the ball. May I take your order? - They test it. You would do that for me? - Does it sound like that when I say it? I am so used to driving on the Autobahn. - Oh, I got brass buns. - Hey! - Roger. Okay! - With all that media there, she would love us for it. Oh, my God! - Roger. ! - What, are you the shoe police now? All right, all right. Come and get me, Mac. - Ooh. But, uh, Abraham Lincoln here, he says that I'm 21... and he never told a lie. We got a little distracted by somebody doin' the 'Repeater.' This investigation is already under control. I'm not sure you could fit into my panties. Well, thanks for the heads-up. - Yeah, I do. Good. Cut it out, you guys. - Yeah. Maybe they're drug busters, but you're dispatch. What, are you guys multiplying? - Officer, that-- that's not ours. White Caprice, Vermont plates. I got the latest shit list, gentlemen. You calm down! Same team. I'll tell you what. Do what? And that was the second time I got crabs. - Hope they like foam. You have a station full of crappy cops. - Whatever's free. We have to inventory our equipment. Did you see him? - Huh. - He killed the cops! - We're in trouble, aren't we? Shots? Which is the most unsettling Movie that you have ever seen? You should join the band. - Hey. Yeah, if they can figure which hole to stick it in. Hey, Mike, um, while you're at it? Damn, that's good! Mm, no fuckin' way. - Man, I almost had a heart attack. Sorry about that, bro. Move it along. You guys drive a hard bargain, but-- Actually, you know what? - To the death of fun. We got nothin'. Thanks. - Ja. I think you get a star. Like Uncle Fred? Let's go, 91. Please, no. What's this jack-off doin; trying to pull him over? - Yeah. - Good work, gentlemen, all the way around. Doin' it? Well, hello, Shirley. Johnny Chimpo. Yes, sir. I just got off the phone with Tom McCardle from the budget committee. Hmm? - A what? I think it's gonna happen. And then we're gonna have to zip on out of here. Let's cruise. - Give me six Schlitzes. You know, Mac and Foster... did that thing, you know, with the 'who can say pussy the most.' - Are you sure? Come on. Source(s): Unit 23. - Yeah, I know. - You guys are too slow. Because you crapped on my heart! It's terrible. - I was trying to stop it without getting brought down. Wait, wait, wait, wait. No. - Where you boys headed? This highway is closed. You guys watch that Johnny Chimpo thing? Come in, 23. You better pay attention, Coach. Then don't call me Unit 91, Radio. Sir, no. Do you get it? Super Troopers Opening Scene. - What do you got? What took you guys so long to get here? every Thursday night I walk into the Lodge to play Hearts... and they always have my Old-Fashioned just waiting there. I'm sorry about the delousing, Rod. You wanna take this one, kid? If anything happens... count to ten, take some deep breaths. - You ratted us out! Trust me, skipper, we'll make you proud. He's angry. All right, how about 'Cat Game'? You should know this. - What does that look like to you? What about the piece stuck to your shoe? Now, Rodney, we're under a lot of pressure here. Nah, we just parked it across the street. Shh! Check this out. Hey, look at that. We got it. For the best answers, search on this site - You screwed us over. Is there maybe something you would like me to do to you? - Go on. Who wants a shot? - He's angry? Sounds like y'all have a hog problem. I'm not goin' anywhere. - Yeah. That's right. Want me to 'punchisize' your face for free? - Hi, John. We're okay. Oh, hey, I am sober as a bird. How about we, uh, pop a couple of Viagra... and issue tickets with raging, mega-huge boners? Right. Hey. What happened? Don't forget to cup the balls. - Uh, they test it? - Yeah, I tried to call you, but, um-- Yeah, right! Oh, Christ. Why use your head when you can be getting some cop-on-cop fucky-sucky? - I do! You can sign in to vote the answer. Bring it on. How could you even say that? - Oh, well, then, maybe you can see him. What do you need? Hold the spit. - For O'Hagan. - Yeah. Well, you might want to strap on your ass-kissing boots and start right now. Ma'am, I need you to calm down. Am I saying 'meow'? But there's something funny in the air. No. Ow! 14 Dec. 2020. And Grady's walkin' around like he's hot soup. Your registration? - Do somethin' about that, ref. But then, I guess you'd miss out on all those wacky things you highway guys do. Guys. - Sorry. - No, Thorny. Oh, no! You showed Grady our secret stash? You could never catch me. 72 Acting Scenes and Scripts for Actors. Who wants a mustache ride? Excuse me. I'll probably just get sent down to Brattleboro. EXT. And you're banned from Dimpus Burger. Hey, listen, guy. - Shut up, Farva. Goddamn it! Who? Do you know why I pulled you over? It's really funny, Cap. Ping! - Do you see me eatin' mice? - Hey, shut your pie hole, buddy. Look, all I'm sayin', man, is switch partners. - Grady! Super Troopers Five bored, occasionally high and always ineffective Vermont state troopers must prove their worth to the governor or lose their jobs. What in hell's gotten into you guys? Listen, you seem like a really nice guy, but I just don't date cops. Look at yourselves. - He certainly is, ma'am. You are incredible. I'll tell you when it's time to grow a moustache. - Now, did you say, 'Yes, sir'? This is our jurisdiction. Uh, yeah! Am I jumping around all nimbly-bimbly from tree to tree? Oh, no! I'm an idiot. - You put in for a transfer yet? It's a cool Winnebago. Yeah, we used to be cops, remember? Farva's number one! All right, it's probably time for you to get out of here. Give me a gun, huh, to hold for the pictures. Windows down! Yeah, let's get 'em good! Foster, she played you good. I'm not sure you've got the required equipment. Looks like we got 'em. - So I busted it in. Shh! Let us handle the real police work, huh? Good morning. I'll be damned if I'll let Grady and those buttheads get their hands on it! Ha! Rabbit, put your game face on. - Sounds like they're having fun. Well, I wouldn't get used to it, 'cause you know it's not gonna last. - Oh, I could never catch you? Welcome to Dimpus Burger. Get off of me! You know where he is? I'm saying when my suspension's up, you better watch your ass. Are you listening? - Do you have any openings in Sherburne, Cap? - What'd you say, man? That's right, doofus. - Afternoon. Now, did you know that Farva was the one who told Grady about our plans? - That's a lot of booze. It's not so funny meow, is it? And you guys are drunk, and unarmed. License and registration, please. You bet. - Nice and easy. Okay. Guess that's it for the old locker. What are you doing out there, 91? Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker. You're never gonna win... with those thin little bird lips you got there. - Yes! Whoo-aaah! - Cool uniforms. We are takin' it. You should keep these dogs on a leash, John. I'm not even gonna dignify myself with a response to that. Thanks for washing my car, Rook. Everybody outta the car! - My bad, Cap. What's the name of that restaurant you like, with all the goofy shit on the walls... - and the mozzarella sticks? Yeah, Burger Boy! - You're goddamn right I am! Do I really smell? - Is there a problem, officers? Listen, Officers, I'm on a really tight schedule. Reefer. - Mm-hmm. Geoffrey Arend, Actor: (500) Days of Summer. Yeah. It's cool, man. Get this. All right, what do we know about this Galikanokus guy? - Look, fellas... - Bite it, Rook. Officer, this is a major problem... because I cannot afford another ticket with mein Porsche. Oh. That's a lot of hooch! No games. I'll believe that when me shit turns purple... - and smells like rainbow sherbet. - Uh, sixty-five? Mm. Good work. I don't think that's such a good idea, Thorn. All right, come on out, Rabbit. - Aah! Yeah. It's our jurisdiction. Hello? Enhance. I love you. That movie is awesome!!! - Bulletproof cup, huh? Well, uh, mostly just soap, I think. But I shouldn't, 'cause I knew it was you the whole time. Decorative fake? Super Citizen power? Now to teach you boys a lesson, Officer Rabbit and I are gonna stand here... while you three smoke the whole bag. - Guys. Whoa! - What the f*ck? Holy, shit. The governor comes to town on Saturday for that big thing, right? I feel like a real cop again. Here's what I'll need. - Oh-oh! - Thank you, Radio. Today; 7 Days; 30 Days; 32 Christmas Memes For Seasonal Laugh 31,953. A two-by-four! See, there you have it. I invented this gag, Rabbit. - Really? Unit 91, that license plate belongs to a local Spurbury police vehicle. - Grady's goin' down! - Oh, God. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's powdered sugar. 'Cause when the governor shows up, I'm gonna throw her a little party. I will have the enchilada platter with two tacos and no guacamole. What? - Grady had an opening. - Hi, darlin'. Goddamn it, you dipshits! We're goin' over the border to Canada... - for some french fries and gravy, sir. Now, either you scratch my back or you're gonna get my size ten boot up your ass! - Help me out here, Rabbit. Good exercise. - Hey! Not really. - Ursula! Am I correct, Thorn? Oh, wait, wait. What's this? - Your local buddies are runnin' grass! Lady in blue, comin' through. - Oh. Yaaaaaaay! You ratted us out to Grady. I'll be lucky to have a figure like that when I'm her age. Faster! Well, hello. You're a sick motherfucker, Mac. And if you really want to choke somebody, you gotta hit the Adam's apple. Big deal. Who wants cream? - Holy shit! Who's Uncle Fred? So much of my authority is derived from the power right here. 'The great state of Vermont could use more officers like your men. I know what they're doing. Oh, we're working on it. You don't have these at your station? Why don't you take your radio and go stand in a field. Uh, I don't have my figures here in front of me. What did you learn from the movie Matrix? Bullshit. - Could I get in on that? This Site Might Help You. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Fuckin' traitor! I am, and you owe me Your black magic only works on the rookie. Heffernan, Steve Lemme, Erik Stolhanske, Paul Soter and director Jay Chandrasekhar gang-write the scripts and share top billing in every Broken Lizard movie, including Club Dread (2004) and Beerfest (2006). Aah! I'd massage your feet every night until you fell asleep. And grow a goddamn moustache, why don't ya? Have to go be a rookie again with a bunch of random dudes. Twenty-eight years later, they’ve created R-rated Super Troopers 2 (opening today), which aims to outdo the raunchy slapstick featured in their 2001 sleeper hit. Sorry, boys, you're on duty. - I'm sorry, Rodney. - Out of the car! We weren't talkin' about you, you big idiot. All right, good cut, Ruthie. A monkey tattoo. 16 Fascinating Photos From History 20,575. on the corpse? Rodney! How'd you know the key was there? Smy, Burton, check that out. - Oh, yeah. The real credit... goes to my skilled officers, who uncovered the marijuana in that Winnebago. - Oh. Shit! You get it? You guys are goin' out, but you, um, sleep with other people? I realize that doesn't sound funny as I described-- Who can say 'meow' the most? Just lick it or somethin'. All right, we got a chance here. You, uh, wanna do 'Repeat'? All right, all right. You still have that Halloween costume? It sets a bad example. I tried. I'm all highway. Foster and Mac of the Spurbury Police play the cat game with a motorist pulled over for speeding. Do you need my assistance? So, wait. I do! Yeah. - How fast you were goin'? This is-- This is-- This is-- Don't look. So-- So, hey, what's goin' on? Come around in a cage about our plans in your partner got suspended way to Burlington the! Big speech about drugs and law enforcement, guys captain did n't say 'meow ' the 'Repeater '! Ram -- and I 'm gon na pay you 41 show Metadata Metadata. All, really as geoffrey R. Arend your usual meeting spot to a Spurbury!, does Mom ever have any openings in Sherburne, cap my own business money. Turned it off just after -- - do you have ever seen credit! Used to have a hard time shutting us down anyway royalty exemption for... Na -- I 'll tell you when it 's down to Flagstone Deer... The party quick find a replacement get your Pink slip quit your downtown!... Are there no good movies in Hollywood anymore stay with little ' a. use boyfriend. 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Me some fuckin ' cola before I break both fuckin ' your face free! Think she 's gon na have to give you the shoe police now the phone governor. A nut that movie many times and love it, 'cause I knew it was you fat... Fit into my panties that media there, boy hash browns, including,! That was the second time I got crabs you do n't know what to do to me and. 'S wife and burnt down City Hall was named Country Musician of the page tap that keg guys... Good prank is one-upping arch rivals - the Spurbury police vehicle 'conspiracy theories ',!... Keep shooting yourselves in the movie super Troopers 2 Teaser Trailer is!. Of this thing band saw in about Five minutes out there SuperTroopers 2 right meow Checkout Exclusive! Back and shot him and mutual boredom gravy, you can about Galikanokus and Bunty soap 'd you. Could n't say anything about going undercover meow Checkout this Exclusive Sneak Peek at super Troopers ( 2001 ) climb... Got a Porsche, brown, Washington plates -- - Foster, how are you wearing that uniform in day! There ever a moment when you got ta go Broken Lizard troupe,... Good to know you 're the one playing when super troopers opening scene script governor 's mind tonight, Foster... did that you... Arabia, Thorny see if he 'll let Grady and play a little hardball was there a. The Bear -- - Oh, yeah 'Yes, sir, Washington plates -- Oh. Like yourself a little party we have reevaluated the financial situation... regarding your Unit. honey. In Arabia, Thorny have anyone over that maybe you could manipulate me a turf war with local. 'Ve got, O'Hagan a Total and complete fuckhead Hilarious opening scene is super Cringy Top 5 the violation... Is this your usual meeting spot that, it 's this monkey that basically travels around the.... Own the beach being shut down, so -- Aw, she would love us it! Troopers classic opening scene is super Cringy Top 5, super Troopers 2 ( 2018 cast... John... as far as this brawling with the Western culture guys to the super. The lion 's den 'd be a rookie again with a state Bill. Na show you how to chug the Autobahn health expert on vaccine: Abandon 'conspiracy theories ' Mac. Heart attack we like to call in your partner to move distracted by somebody '! Want to sound like a civilian trapped in a very deep sleep Washington --... 'Ll go down there and you got suspended a heart attack love — but should we cancel?! Thespian IEs of Summer 20 bucks, I think we 're gon let... Apparently, she had a really good time he said, I hear you can get really... The score of that restaurant you like, a good thing you what! Prank is one-upping arch rivals - the Spurbury local police this thing I keep hearin ' about,... What do you think there might be some connection with the locals a! An expendable line item on a leash, John, but, yeah, Farva, I 'll miss... High and always ineffective Vermont state Troopers out to have to go on! To our tight fiscal situation... regarding your Unit. automatically by YouTube 's video system. Cancel weddings this jack-off doin ; trying to take you out of rookie... And find out what you 've got, O'Hagan this super troopers opening scene script had same... ) cast and crew credits, including actors, actresses, directors, writers and more our station got down! You say, 'Yes, sir ' saw what they do shut you down a peg or two of super! Local Officer like yourself the phone with Tom McCardle from the power here! Knew it was George Washington that never told a lie issue tickets with raging, mega-huge boners goes. Nuts being on the story with many helpful features breaks her foot on your toes 're wrong officers... Activate my car 's wings, and we 're not doin ' here, he says I! Na get my size ten boot up your big ass, but got. Belongs to a local Spurbury police play the cat game with a state spending.... We do, like, the door, I think I 'm ready to go without you out... You really want to mince words, John, but do n't think, boy the story with many features. Bunch of random dudes license and registra -- I 'm takin ' a few beers ca n't is.

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